Monogamous & non-monogamous relationships are long-standing pair structures that serve humans best. But what is scary about these terminologies are new trends and norms of some particular cultures that confuse people about the mere purpose of monogamy and non-monogamous relationships.
Unfortunately, Western society is already facing many crises regarding family structure and the level of society as a whole. Therefore, it becomes more crucial that we stick to our roots and protect our family’s future from today’s woke agendas.
This article is all about shedding light on our traditional relationship structures and their realities, hopefully, this guide will help you to see different dimensions of human relationships.
A brief note on monogamy
A monogamous relationship is a relationship where two individuals are married/committed to each other. Both the individuals are mutually agreed to be loyal and faithful and to be emotionally & sexually exclusive, which means they don’t have any emotional or sexual interaction with others outside the covenant.
Modern terms and types of monogamy
We have discussed the basics but there are some other terms associated with monogamy which are as follows:
- Marriage monogamy: This is a traditional one the same as we have discussed above about two individuals exclusively married to each other.
- Long-term monogamous: Two individuals are emotionally and sexually exclusively bound to each other for a long period but don’t have a legal identity or marriage per se.
- Sexual monogamy: A kind of commitment where two individuals have sexual interaction with only each other. But again they are not in legal commitment.
Key features of monogamy
Commitment:
This is the foundation of any monogamous relationship. You have this level of dedication to only one person. Your decisions and goals are tied to your devotion to your special one.
Exclusivity:
There is only one person you can sexually, and emotionally rely on. You cannot explore other options and you have to remain faithful to the one you are devoted to. There is a long-term partnership and support system that has your back through life’s ups and downs.
Communication:
Communication can play a key role. You have to communicate openly about your fears, needs and desires. What are your concerns, what do you need in a relationship, and what is bothering you? You should be clear and concise about setting your relationship goals.
Trust:
The backbone of any partnership is trust. You have to trust each other and mutually respect the decisions you both make for the wellness of your relationship. Don’t cheat on each other. Remember that all your loyalty, faithfulness, & love is devoted to the one who is worthy of your royalty. You are each other’s center of attention and deserve priority.
Monogamy in different cultures
Monogamous relationships are accepted, practiced, & appreciated in most cultures, perhaps considered the default way to start a family. Not only have different cultures adopted and benefited from monogamous relationships but this partnership is also recommended by many religions. In the US, it is also legal and supported.
Why you should consider a monogamous relationship?
When it comes to long-term commitments and about starting a family you should be careful to make a quick or influenced decision. Your decision should be based on rationality and emotional intelligence. See the value of what a monogamous relationship can bring to your life: Long-term commitment, loyalty, exclusivity, trust, and most importantly faithfulness. If your priorities and concerns align with such structure and you financially, emotionally, & mentally can afford only one loyal committed person then monogamy is the best option for you.
“Remember our feelings are temporary so don’t make long-term decisions based on temporary emotions” -Asma Khan Balouch
Non-monogamous or polyamory relationships
In non-monogamous relationships, more than two persons are committed emotionally and sexually. In such settings usually, the primary partners are aware of other parties.
Types of polyamory
- Polygyny: Where more than two women are married to one husband. Polygyny is an old norm practiced by many conquerors, kings, and preindustrial personalities throughout human history.
- Polyandry: It’s a kind of new term or norm that comes with its set of complexities. It’s a relationship where one women have more than one husband or sexual partner. This concept seems hardly accepted by any religion, society, or even medical science. This setting has more drawbacks than advantages. Some argue about gender equality as opposed to polygyny to support the polyandry structure. It’s not about rights and rules but a more rational and medical debate.
Modern terms for non-monogamous relationships
- Polyfidelity: It refers to a group of three or more individuals who are committed to one another and don’t date outside the group.
- Solo polyamory: Such individuals are not committed to anyone and can have relationships with anybody. They have freedom over their decisions and in their private life.
- Hierarchal: In hierarchal polyamory, people have primary or basic partnerships that get most of their attention and devotion, and then the secondary ones, and so on.
- Non-hierarchal: This is just the opposite of those hierarchal relationships. The involved parties receive the same amount of attention and time. You can find equality in such a relationship.
- Open relationship: Parties involved in open relationships are also open to other opportunities outside the committed ones.
Monogamy vs Non-monogamy
Both monogamy and non-monogamy relationships have different structures and approaches. Some may resonate with monogamous relationship structures others may feel drawn to non-monogamous ones. It all depends on once personal concerns, values, culture, religion, and social backgrounds whether to adopt one or not. Each type has some drawbacks and advantages too but it also matters what are your preferences.
What is the ethical non-monogamous relationship?
Not all non-monogamous settings are acceptable in every society. But it is a polygyny relationship that is acceptable and legal in many societies and religions even though it’s a subjective matter. Polygyny was also practiced by Mormonism (Latter-day Saints) but not as a mainstream practice and was discontinued in the late 19th century.
Other religions like Islam openly prescribe and accept polygyny but of course, there are certain rules & regulations to meet this standard. Some African traditional religions also support this setting. If we talk about societies like historical Asians, African & Middle Eastern cultures, tribal & indigenous societies, and some Indian cultures also seem to practice polygyny.
A non-monogamous relationship is needed at the time
If we look at today’s dating structures and norms of society it would be difficult to find a fulfilling monogamous relationship. People rarely stick to one person nowadays. In addition, there is an increased number of women population in almost all states of the US and the average percentage is about 50% according to the Census Bureau.
This means that there will be fewer men and more women which creates a challenging situation in family structure. Non-monogamous especially polygyny relationships can resolve these issues if applied more ethically and stably.
Final Thoughts:
Both have diversity in relationship structures that come with all of their pros and cons. Before jumping to a conclusion on whether monogamy or polyamory is the best choice for you, consider all consequence that comes along with the decision.
This is a life-changing decision that should not be based on socially influenced behaviors or fleeting emotions. Many people including dating and life coaches’ talk about this and recommend considering your feelings and how you feel about something.
But no one is telling you that your feelings are temporary and you have full control over your mind and thoughts. And you can make the best decision without any attachments. Because it’s about your future family.
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